Sunday, May 9, 2010

Social Etiquette

note: I do not write about my outfit or fashion AT ALL here. So if you're just here for the clothes, feel free to not read another word. I would not be offended. But, uh, if you text in a social situation, I most certainly will be.

Okay, I wrote this whole post on Social Etiquette because I have some pet peeves. But then I got annoyed with myself for being so darn bossy. So I thought I would just tell you a couple of my pet peeves and you can tell me yours. And then maybe together we could compile a list of modern day social etiquette rules without breaking them in the process.

Here's my top three:

1. People who text in social situations. I will be out for dinner/lunch/brunch/coffee with a group of people and invariably there will be someone texting the WHOLE time. I find this a very strange phenomenon. I mean, why go out with people if you are just going to ignore them and text the whole time? When someone does this they are basically saying to everyone present: "I don't want to be here. You are all unimportant to me." So uh, maybe go home.

2. Not reciprocating. I buy you Starbucks. You buy me Starbucks. I help you move. You help me move. I compliment your nice butt. You compliment my awesome calves (they're fantastic). I invite you over for dinner. You invite me over for dinner (J & N, really, we will have you over soon! Really!).

3. I'll get back to you. If I email, call, text, write a letter, or send you a message: uh call me, text me, email me, write me, back (M.D.T---write me back!). Simply not responding to/getting back to someone is the epitome of rudeness. It is basically saying: "Oh, you? You are completely unimportant to me. I have much better things to do then acknowledge your attempt at communication". That said, sorry S. And I NEED to email my grandmother ASAP!!

Do you have any social etiquette pet peeves? I'd love to hear them.

Oh, and all this said, I'm (obviously) no social etiquette superwoman. But I do know when I do stupid stuff (alot) & (unfortunately the same cannot be said about me saying stupid stuff, I don't always know when I say stupid stuff). And anyway, I think the problem with modern society is that people really don't know they are being rude. What do you think?

outfit details:

dress, : $80
shoes, naturalizer: $30
jacket, thrifted: $4
glasses, kate spade, via $68
bracelet, return to tiffany and co.: a gift
assorted bangles: mostly stolen

Heart: Kimberellie (who is now wondering if it is rude to have an outfit post on a fashion blog and not mention the outfit once?)

edit--I wanted to add, all my pet peeves are things I do. Some of them often (with the exception of texting, I really don't get that...too many little buttons). Also, I know we all offend one another all the time. And I think the most important thing to learn is to be gracious and forgive one another for what we all can sometimes be--complete jerks!

I wrote this, not because I think I'm exempt, but because I know I have my own blindspots and I wanted to hear what other people thought was "rude". It's always been sort of my goal to eliminate rudeness entirely from myself personally. I'm afraid I may have very far to go, mind you!

I heart you all, even those of you who text. But not those of you who text and drive. SERIOUSLY, you could kill someone.


  1. OMG. I hear you on the reciprocating thing!! AHHH it drives me nuts. Like, yeah, I have a good heart and I'll do nice things for the people I care about, but when I really go out of my way, I kind of expect something back down the way!

    My pet peeves:

    a) People who start texting conversations and then act unexcited when you text them. Like, hello, you texted me, don't act like I'm boring me because you are the one boring me!
    b) people who fish for compliments. When they say: Ew, I look so fat today. Or, Eric said I have a really nice ass, it was SOOOOOO weird, don't you think??? Ugh.
    c) Overall intolerance. When people judge too fast or don't talk to someone because they don't take the time to get to know them and judge from what they see. It kills me!!! I guess this applies to so much...but. Yeah.


  2. Please. Thank you. You're welcome. Excuse me. I'm sorry. Why can't people say these things anymore? That is my peeve.

  3. The texting thing used to drive me crazy. Now I mind it less because a) I've definitely gotten used to it and b) the people I'm around who do it can do it without ignoring me at the same time. It still pisses me off if people text without being able to multitask.

    I agree with your pet peeves and have to add when people are having phone conversations when other people are around. It's the worst when it's just you and a few other people and one of them is chatting on the phone. I especially hate it in the car or confined spaces.

  4. I don't know about etiquette, I don't like it when people are rude but I don't know specifically when this bothers me :).
    Oh, I do get annoyed when people use sarcasm ALL the time because they think it makes them look smarter than everyone else.

    But mostly, I came in to say that I LOVE your dress! And I know I'm a bit AWOL right now, but exams are coming up and I'm rushing to get my school assignments finished in time. I'll definitely update this week!

  5. gosh, i think you may have just described me. i'm pretty flaky and it will take me a long time to get back with people. i do sometimes text in social situations and at the store when i should be talking with the clerk about my purchase and stuff. yikes! sorry :) you do look adorable and very 60s.

  6. hmmm, I think I have seen this dress before... oh yeah at my wedding! I still love it now as much as I did then, it just suits you so well.

    My pet peeves:
    1) all the ones you mentioned,plus
    2) people talking on cell phones when they are at a till in a store, cafe, etc. If you are too busy talking to someone on your phone you shouldn't be in line. (this might just be a pet peeve leftover from working at Starbucks though... I could go on and on about how rude people are when they are at Starbucks).
    3) Not waving when someone lets you into a lane while driving. Seriously, it takes two seconds.
    4) When people write awe, when they really mean aww.

    Oh, dear it looks like I have a lot of pet peeves. Oh well.

    p.s. Nice calves Kimberellie!

  7. Oh man, social life for human beings is so complicated.

    I really hate it when people don't call if they are over 15 minutes late.

    Um, okay, about our cabin. First of all, we moved out of it two months ago because the land owner was the most truly irrational and mean hearted person I'd ever known. We were warned, but the situation seemed so good that we went for it anyway. It was when she started stealing our mail and accusing us of crazy things that we decided to get the F out, We are now in a sweet 110 year old miner's cabin that serves our needs so much better. If you are on Facebook friend request me (through VF) and I can direct you to some photos of the old (and new!) place there.

    Oh and, yeah, nice calves lady! Oh and I so feel you on the "the baby's sleeping and I should be cleaning but I'm commenting on blogs" thing!

  8. the texting while having a conversation is DEFINITELY something i will not put up with. if someone starts to do it i automatically cease talking and stare til they stop. the awkward silence is quite effective :-)

    btw, totally not etiquette related but you're beautiful in blue.

  9. I love your dress... the color and the print are so pretty.

    Social etiquette... I have a lot of pet peeves. I also hate people texting in the middle of conversations. In the blogging world, I also hate bloggers who leaves comments without reading the whole posts then end their comment with the words Follow me? Hahaha! Why on earth will I follow somebody who doesn't even know how to show respect.

    Have a great day! xoxo

  10. What a cute dress--very retro housewife, in a very good way :)

    I agree with you about the texting--and I extend my pet peeve to include high school students who think it's a good idea to text in class. Seriously? My other pet peeve is mean drivers. Driving is frustrating enough for me already!

  11. I'm guilty of some of them :) I used to get really annoyed at people that text during conversations with me, but now I just stop talking and wait for their thumbs to finish. Or I check my own messages.

    There was something I thought about last night when I read this post, and I forget now.. It probably had something to do with grocery stores. I feel like people are so rude there, I don't even go anymore.

    I love your dress, the print is so cute, and the colors look fabulous on you!!!

  12. I have a lot of example of rudeness, but most of them pertain to my day job as a server. Like, not responding when I come up to your table and say, "Hello, how are you?" or worse, responding with "Coke" which is not the answer to the question I asked, I will ask you for your drink order in one. Effing. Second.

    Outside of work, I hate when people do not hold the door for a person who is immediately behind them. I'm just thinking, "WTF, you let it slam in someone's face because...." THERE IS NO GOOD EXPLANATION. You're just oblivious. On par with that is people bucking traffic and not moving out of your way while doing it. We walk on the RIGHT side in American and I should not have to move for you if you choose to ignore this fact.

    Yeah, I get angry.

  13. Oh, yes, and I forgot one more!

    People saying, "Oh, you're so skinny." Fool you wouldn't go up to someone and say, "You're so fat." Why do you think it's ok in reverse? Shut your mouth and go admire my figure from afar.


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