Mommy's Little Dress-up Doll

This is my daughter's first dress.  OH!  How I love those words: "my daughter".  I think every girl imagines having a daughter one day (or well, most girls).  Certainly I imagined it.  And so when I had my son first it was surprising to me that I could no longer imagine loving a daughter.  I was just so (and still am) enamored with him.

"Why would anyone want a daughter when they could have a son?"  I wondered.

But now that I have a daughter as well, all my former mother-daughter imaginings have come to full bloom; and my mind and heart are full of anticipated joys: prom, french braids, barrettes, mother daughter spa days, doing our nails, shopping (if she doesn't like shopping I may cry), little dresses, her wedding!.  Oh yes, I'm EXCITED.  I guess because I am a daughter myself I can imagine so much more than I can with my son.  I've never been a son.  My heart for his future is full of joy, yes; but it so harder to imagine his perspective.  So it is exciting to be a mother to a daughter.

A friend recently asked me who I loved more.  And the question startled me.  I hadn't thought of that.  She pointed out that I had known Soren longer, and I knew more about him, so shouldn't I love him more?  And in some ways you would think that would be true.  I remember falling in love with Soren (and still I do) every couple of months all over again as he grew older and became more (and there was more of him to love).  Yet as logical as it would be, I don't love him more than her.

You see, I love Soren more now that Violet is born.  And I love Violet more because of the love I already have for Soren.  In fact, I love everyone more.  I love you more.  I love perfect strangers more.  I love my husband more.  I love God more.  I just love more.  My heart has widened beyond what I knew possible.  It's like when I fell in love with my husband: it opened my heart up to everyone and everything. And now that I have THREE (!) very favourite people, my heart is even wider.

I think true love is like this.  It isn't exclusive.  It never comes at the cost of another love.  Any real love will cause every other love you have (of anything at all, be it painting or people) to expand.  So there is never any comparison.

I love each child more because I love the other.  And it's wonderful.

dress: carters, gift from marilynn

cardigan: please mum, gift from auntie crystal

tights, gap: 2.99

booties: were my husband's when he was a baby

quilt: made by nana (husband's mom)

Heart: Kimberellie

8lbs 9oz of CUTE!

Violet Louise Furnell 8lbs 9oz July 15th dark brown hair--BEAUTIFUL

Well, this will have to be a short post considering I have a baby on my chest.

Violet Louise Furnell(ie) arrived in the world at 2:36 am after 1.5 hours of active labour and 45 minutes of pushing (because you want to know this right?).  Well, I am telling you anyway.  Because I am darn proud of myself!  She came out sunny side up (they are not supposed to come out this way!).  And yes, apparently I did an awesome job because sunny side up babies usually end up in emergency c-sections.  At one point I remember someone saying something about "assistance" (ie. vacuum or forceps) to which I said: "No f___ing way!"  At the time I didn't know she was sunny side up so I had no idea why they would even be suggesting this.  And yes, I had the epidural.  And it was WONDERFUL (all you ladies who have had "natural labours" props to you...but I couldn't bear it...it was unbearable...even though it was my goal...still my accomplishment is not diminished!  So all you ladies who have yet to have babies--don't think your accomplishment is any less no matter how you do it: c-section, assistance, epidural, etc...we all still rock).

But yes.  I am triumphant birther, life giver extraordinaire.  It was quite a contrast with my son's birth which was LONG (13 hours hard labour) and excruciating.  So I feel pretty fricken' empowered.  Not to mention they didn't turn the epidural off without telling me this time!  So yes.  It was a truly wonderful experience.  But all second time moms: get your bumps to the hospital asap.  Unlike me...who waited too long...because heck, one and a half hours?  That's a BIG difference from 13.

And as for baby Violet?  She is AMAZING.  She SLEEPS.  Seriously, 5-7 hour stretches at night.  And she's only 6 days old! And don't worry, she's still gaining weight...twice as much as she needs to actually.    But yes, also don't hate me too much: I've paid my dues.  My son would wake every 2 hours at night to nurse for the first TWO months (and after that not much better).  I recall my fervent wish when he was little was to sleep for JUST three hours in a row...please...please...please.  Not to mention that he didn't start sleeping through the night until he was 25(!) months.  So yes...if your child doesn't sleep, maybe your next will.  And no matter what anyone tells you, it isn't your parenting.  Because I haven't done anything differently.

Well, one thing I did differently was pray my entire pregnancy that "please please please may she just SLEEP!" and "please please please may my labour be EASIER!"  So yes.  It worked.  Props to God.  ;-)

Well, that was actually rather long.  But I think I am just so darned excited.  And I am so incredibly in love with this little girl.  My heart is full.  I am very very grateful.  And I know how very blessed I am to have two beautiful healthy children.

Heart: Kimberellie (with a baby in her arms)

ps. in the picture she is only four hours old.

we made baby hats.

The husband and I.  He did the basic hat.  I did the embellishments.  I have two days until my due date.  Due dates, I learned with my son, mean nothing.  If you are ever pregnant you will want to know this.  Nonetheless, we made hats.  Here they are!  That's Bigbaby in the third and fourth photos.  She wanted to try them on.  We're not especially creative with baby doll names in our house!  We have, Babybaby, Bigbaby, and Baby Zee Zee.  Bigbaby is really big.  Ummm....I think I'm too tired to blog.

ps. thanks for all your sweet comments on my last post!  Except of course whoever just said: "u r huge".  Which was probably one of my brothers.  So I am not offended.  But nonetheless, not really what a pregnant woman wants to hear.  I know it was one of you.  I KNOW!

and the winner of cutest pregnant woman is: ME!!!*

I actually have tons of photos (well, maybe 7) that I COULD be uploading.  But I am not.  But I will.  Only not right now.  Later.  I am tired.  I need to fold laundry.  Or eat ice cream.  We'll see.

Hey, also, I'm 38 weeks pregnant.  Actually, closer to 39 at this point.  Let's just say: "I have ten days left".  Because I do.  Are you getting excited?  I am.  I am.  I am.  I am.  And in case you are wondering why I am not HUGE in this picture, it's because this is me at 31 weeks pregnant.  Wow, I am behind on blogging.  Also, I'm hungry.  Ice cream it is.

Heart: Kimberellie Miss Furnellie with a baby in her belly

* I'm not vain.  I'm adorable.