"Why would anyone want a daughter when they could have a son?" I wondered.
But now that I have a daughter as well, all my former mother-daughter imaginings have come to full bloom; and my mind and heart are full of anticipated joys: prom, french braids, barrettes, mother daughter spa days, doing our nails, shopping (if she doesn't like shopping I may cry), little dresses, her wedding!. Oh yes, I'm EXCITED. I guess because I am a daughter myself I can imagine so much more than I can with my son. I've never been a son. My heart for his future is full of joy, yes; but it so harder to imagine his perspective. So it is exciting to be a mother to a daughter.
A friend recently asked me who I loved more. And the question startled me. I hadn't thought of that. She pointed out that I had known Soren longer, and I knew more about him, so shouldn't I love him more? And in some ways you would think that would be true. I remember falling in love with Soren (and still I do) every couple of months all over again as he grew older and became more (and there was more of him to love). Yet as logical as it would be, I don't love him more than her.
You see, I love Soren more now that Violet is born. And I love Violet more because of the love I already have for Soren. In fact, I love everyone more. I love you more. I love perfect strangers more. I love my husband more. I love God more. I just love more. My heart has widened beyond what I knew possible. It's like when I fell in love with my husband: it opened my heart up to everyone and everything. And now that I have THREE (!) very favourite people, my heart is even wider.
I think true love is like this. It isn't exclusive. It never comes at the cost of another love. Any real love will cause every other love you have (of anything at all, be it painting or people) to expand. So there is never any comparison.
I love each child more because I love the other. And it's wonderful.
dress: carters, gift from marilynn
cardigan: please mum, gift from auntie crystal
tights, gap: 2.99
booties: were my husband's when he was a baby
quilt: made by nana (husband's mom)
Heart: Kimberellie
This made me tear up. In the really good way. Thanks :)
ReplyDeleteWhat a lovely passage of writing,a nice read,even if I'm only 16 and haven't had thse joys yet.
ReplyDeleteI think as a girl,the prospect of a daughter does excite.Though to be honest,I'm not that maternal or into the idea of kids(atleast not yet!)
Sofie
ps,the dress is very sweet,plus what a good name choice!
Beautifully written.
ReplyDeleteI've always wanted to have a girl first... now I have two. I love them both as much as the other, you could never love one more. Both my girls are baldies... 3 yr old has never had a haircut and there isn't enough hair to tie up! Not that I mind, there will be plenty of time for that (x 2!)
xo
This is such a great post...I love(!) Everything you wrote!
ReplyDeleteyour daughter is a doll!
you're such a good writer. How precious she is! Definitely all dressed up
ReplyDeleteYou are a delight and Violet is beautiful! x
ReplyDeleteAwwww her little booties are too cute. Awwwwwww, I cannot stop saying that.
ReplyDeleteBoutzie
Too adorable!!! This is a wonderful post, you write beautifully. Said in so many words our feelings as a mother. And I couldn't help wondering whether your friend is a mother herself? If so, I cannot believe she would ask you such a thing!!
ReplyDeleteI love reading your thoughts on being a mother--they are so honest and beautiful. I hope to be a mother one day and reading what you have to say about it makes me even more excited! And I must say that Violet looks like a little angel in her first dress! You're going to have WAY too much fun dressing her up!
ReplyDeleteCongrats, Kim!! She is absolutely beautiful! I'm loving all the love! And I'm sure she will always be dressed wonderfully.
ReplyDeletekim, this is beautiful. i love how you've described family and motherhood; it rings true with what i've learned (and am still learning!) about both.
ReplyDeleteand i know i've said to you before but it bears saying again: gosh darn! do you ever make cute newborn babies!!
Oh she looks like a little doll! Congratulations lady.
ReplyDeleteAlso, I'm pretty sure she's going to be the best dressed little girl around. I can't wait to see her first foray into print mixing!
Congrats on your beautiful girl! What a sweet post, and that dress is adorable!
ReplyDeleteshe is a doll!!! congratulations :) i love her sweet sweet dress :)
ReplyDeletewhoa, this baby is just beautiful!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteShe is SO precious and BEAUTIFUL!! I adore her outfit :-)
ReplyDelete